Thursday, February 16, 2006
I'm Hanging Up On You
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 Hello.
This is Ann-Margret to your right. Some of you may know her as a former Hollywood Actress (just because she is cast in the upcoming SANTA CLAUSE 3 - playing Santa's Mother In Law - does not mean you can still refer to her as a current Hollywood Actress). Some of you may also know her as the former cock-hole for Elvis Presley.
For those of you who don't know of her, ask your parents, they may even have one of the movies she did with Elvis hidden away to show you (this was back in a time where the line "did/doing a movie" was not followed by "whilst getting fucked", and we can ALL thank Pamela, Tommy, Paris and Debra Fucking Byrne for changing all that now can't we?).
Ann-Margret has starred in over 70 fillums, and god knows how many television shows as a guest. Were you, however, aware that Miss. M had quite the illustrious musical career as well?
She's had quite a few albums, and judging by the look of her discography over on the official site, it was all rather respectable - I mean for christs sake - she has her OWN 5 DISC BOX SET BEST OF COLLECTION.
Glance over the allocated pictures of her albums. Rather nice, aren't they? Ann looks a charm, stunning, and all that other crap. Songs filled with soppy love songs and a few "ditties" your parents may have attempted Go-Go Dancing to in their youth. So you can imagine my surprise when I got wind of the news Ann had once recorded a disco album.
YES. A DISCO ALBUM. CALLED "LOVE RUSH".
Unfortunately, "Love Rush" only gets a brief listing over on her official discography without a picture, unlike all her other "Long Players" that are shown off quite proudly.
Why on earth would Ann leave off something as career defining as her very own disco album? If I had my own disco album, it would be the most shown off item in my discography, and surely, if you were to have your own disco album, it would be the same case, would it not?
But then again, would either of our disco album front covers look like this?
WHAT.
THE.
FUCK.
?
Excuse me Ann, but it appears you've forgotten to wash your face thoroughly after the last slodge of CUM WENT FLYING INTO YOUR EYE.
Is it really any wonder why poor Ann refuses to display this albums artwork on her website, it is absolutely mortifying to look at. What were her "people" thinking when they green-lit this as the photo for the record? Were they all that coked off their heads that they didn't notice Ann was having a mild stroke? Did they simply forget Ann hadn't unplugged whatever undisclosed object someone from Paramount had stuck in her the night before? Or - and god forbid - were the remaining, left out photographs ACTUALLY WORSE THAN THE FINAL ONE?
Outrageous really, isn't it?
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