Friday, November 04, 2005
Mum On A Dancefloor
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 She's back!! And so is Madonna!! Yes, our mother has come out of the woodwork to observe yet another pop music gem for you all. After the roaring success of the Rachel Stevens review we conducted with our dear Mum, she's here to do it all again, but in the name of disco, something she says she was very fond of before we ruined her social life.
HUNG UP
IAR: Opening the album with this excellent ABBA stormer, a clear indication of why Madge really is the queen.
MUM: This is almost better than the actual original ABBA song! Lovely. 9/10
GET TOGETHER
IAR: Hints of slick-French House, the robotic 'melody' is somewhat floaty, with Mo purring about hooking up with someone. Would sound amazing on a large system at one of those daytime summer raves.
MUM: It's a bit like that song... uh.. (starts to sing Daft Punk's "One More Time"). Very good. 9/10
SORRY
IAR: It all starts with the Queen of pop apologizing in different languages. The jury is still out on whether this multi-cultural apology is for dueting with Britney Spears. Anywho, "Sorry" will be the albums 2nd single, and it's very easy to see why. Pop perfection with a chorus that sucks you in, and the amazing lyric "There's more important things than hearing you speak".
MUM: Very good this is. Impressive, can only imagine what the video clip will be like. Strong vocals too, I like this better than the new single actually. 10/10
FUTURE LOVERS
IAR: Slightly "borrowing" a bit of Donna Summer, this Mirwais production is quite nice, with a spoken intro that runs about 20 seconds too long. When the beat finally does kick in, it's all worth it.
MUM: This is rather terrible. 7/10
I LOVE NEW YORK
IAR: Yes. Album hits its weak point right about here. You would all have heard about the infamous lyric where Madge refers to herself as a dork.
MUM: Is she serious? Someone should tell her to shut up. 5/10
LET IT WILL BE
IAR: The opening violin strings sound a lot like the string arrangement used on Mo's "Papa Don't Preach". Aside from extremely poor grammar in the title, this is quite a lush song that would probably sound rather divine after double dropping some ecstasy.
MUM: This is much better. It reminds me of a song you could light some candles and have a bath to. 8/10
FORBIDDEN LOVE
IAR: There are slight hints of earthy-Ray Of Light melodies through this entire album, just a lot bigger and dancier. This is THE mellow-ray moment on the album. Exquisite in so many ways. Pity she had a song with the same title on her Bedtime Stories album.
MUM: Yeah it's nice enough. She sounds rather sexy on this. 9/10
JUMP
IAR: Reminding us of "Thief of Hearts", this track is probably her most early-90's-house moment. Killer choon with an infectiously jovial chorus.
MUM: Another dancey number! Madonna's great, isn't she?! 9/10
HOW HIGH
IAR: Sounding like a MUCH better take on Kylie's mediocre "Come Into My World", another major album highlight, with some rather strong lyrics: "I take just about everything/except my own advice/Nobody's perfect/I guess I deserve it".
MUM: The whole album is a lot more floaty-like than I expected. Not complaining, but it's a far cry from rave music isn't it? 10/10
ISAAC
IAR: Another top album highlight, Kabbalah infused Hebrew prayer opens it, following some extremely hypnotic and just-damn-lovely beats, with Madge "mmmmm"ing through out. Absolute ripper.
MUM: That hebrew chant is quite haunting in such a lovely way. I have goosebumps, this is very good, and her humming has been taken right from some of her other singles. She's a clever little Italian isn't she? 10/10
PUSH
IAR: Ode to hubby Guy, this is extremely world-music like in all the right ways. The chorus is strong and solid, but it's the rapid rate of each verse that gives this number its potent edge.
MUM: Another favourite. This album is shaping up to be a lot better than her last few. 10/10
LIKE IT OR NOT
IAR: This is pleasant. Not a bad way to end the album, with Mo singing "Sticks and stones may break my bones/but your names will never hurt". She also sings a line containing "Better the devil you know" which can only be a good thing.
MUM: Nice enough. 7/10
So that's that really. Without a doubt this is the greatest album of the year, and is probably Madonna's 3rd or 4th best album overall.
American Life is still probably her 2nd best, and in about 5 years time, everyone will realise that it is just spellbindingly good and Madge's own "Impossible Princess".
Until then, "Confessions" dishes up all the right moves and grooves. Welcome back Madonna, we've bloody missed you.
Mirrorballs out of 10? Without a doubt...
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